I keep putting off writing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It’s not that I don’t have anything to say. It’s not that I don’t want to write. There’s just no wind in my sales. All the old tricks I used to use aren’t granting me forward motion. The waters of my mind are still and deep. And I haven’t wanted to talk about it because we’re all depressed enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There is a lot going on. I don’t want to talk about any of that, either. You all have access to the news the same as I do. A pivotal election, perhaps the last free election we’ll ever have in the US, is almost upon us. It is a lot.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At this moment, I should be attending a panel at the online Surrey International Writer’s Conference. I attended one earlier today, but I kept thinking, “Yes, I know” and “I will” and “Yup, got it.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The panel wasn’t bad! The conference is good. I’m just in a terrible headspace for it. I feel like a soccer player sitting in the stands, watching the rest of my team run through practices while I’m trying to recover from a serious leg injury.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I’m not in the game right now. I’m not sure when or if I’ll be in the game again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It actually isn’t that complicated, now that I’m thinking about it. Writing makes me happy. I normally want a career as a writer because I’d be adding stories to a world that always needs stories, and that type of activity makes me feel fulfilled and happy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I write because it makes me happy. Maybe I’m not writing right now because I don’t want to be happy right now. Not with everything else going on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe taking vacation time to attend an online conference was a mistake. Maybe I should have just taken vacation time in order to take vacation time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Going back to the analogy I used to start this post, the wind will blow again. The calm can’t last forever. I will try to be patient with myself and get through this difficult time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Quitting isn’t an option. Maybe I can wait it out.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I keep putting off writing. It’s not that I don’t have anything to say. It’s not that I don’t want to write. There’s just no wind in my sales. All the old tricks I used to use aren’t granting me forward motion. The waters of my mind are still and deep. And I haven’t wanted […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4067","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4067","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4067"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4067\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4068,"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4067\/revisions\/4068"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4067"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4067"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/briancebuhl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4067"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}